Island of Misfit (Kitchen) Tools

December 20, 2005

Goofing around on the Chef’s website I found a bunch of kitchen tools that made me think: “WTF?” I’m no Alton Brown or Wolfgang Puck, but I find these tools to be unnecessary even BEFORE I started TRS.

Let the sarcasm begin:

I need my Kashi Good Friends Cereal like plants need carbon dioxide. Also I have limited counter space. I don’t need the George Jetson type of containers to give me measured cereal with a turn of a dial. Who does? Who is THAT anal retentive?

A “Cornbread Kit.” Seriously … a kit. A retarded monkey can make cornbread. If you are really that incompetent in the kitchen stick to a box of Jiffy. Given as a gift I would just smile a strained grin, but inside there would be many explicative deleted going on inside my brain.

Okay in all honesty some people may not know that instead of buying this $8 pie chain using raw black beans (or any beans) and rice will do the same thing (i.e. prevent your crust from bubbling and lifting up). I’ll let this slide.

S’mores are good, but I never had a craving bad enough to own this. The sad thing is that this is on sale from $40. I have two words for you “toaster oven.”

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  • Reply Anonymous December 20, 2005 at 5:09 pm

    SCATHING! I love it!

    It’s people like me that need people like you. My idea of a gourmet meal that I can make is Ramen noodles with a side of toast.

    Good read today.

    — I.S.

  • Reply NerdNoir December 21, 2005 at 2:29 am

    The “Cornbread Kit” should be sent to the girl on Food 911 who doesn’t know how to roast a chicken.

    Lest we not forget the ultimate gadget.


  • Reply Harker December 22, 2005 at 12:19 am

    If you think those are bad you should look up the Chocilate Fondue Fountain. A running fountain of chocolate so you can dip your strawberries in. WTF?

  • Reply Kitchen_Kitten December 22, 2005 at 4:25 am

    Stallion –
    Unless you are in college or on welfare NO ONE should eat freeze dried Ramen noodles.

    NerdNoir –
    Don’t get me started on the Emeril waffle maker that imprints the words “BAM!” on your waffles.

    Harker –
    We have one of those fountains at school and you would be surprised how many people who tour the kitchens are simple delighted and amazed by that thing.

    Like ice sculptures chocolate fountains don’t impress me.

    People stick their nasty fingers in the chocolate (although usually by accident), the fountain clogs easily, but hey, you can rent them out for weddings and it’s the new hot item. It’s a trend.

    ::shrugs: I don’t get it. WTF

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